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“Lovemaking!!” • May 16, 2006

Sometimes it’s not about sex!

English is really a weird language — particularly as we use it.  For example, we almost totally equate “lovemaking” with “sex.”

In another M Column I’m gonna talk about why “sex” is, or at least should be, all about “lovemaking.”  But in this one, I want to just focus on “lovemaking” which to me includes other things than just sex.  I define it as doing ANYTHING that has the result of increasing the love between two people.

So let’s look at an example of what I’m talking about:

One of my most wonderful times — memorable times — of “lovemaking” with Roger was when I got in really late at night after a horrible day that ended a totally rotten week on the road.  I’d really missed him — and I was really eager.  That is, eager in both an “I missed you” way and in a “very sexual” way, too.

So Roger picked my up at the airport, (I had been off with Miss DNA and THE Boss — they weren’t the cause of the rotten week — our clients were the culprits!!)  He held me so sweetly and gave me a wonderful welcoming kiss.  I’d filled up on shrimp cocktail on the plane, (THE Boss always has the best catering,) so he just drove me home.  I’d called him from the plane earlier and spent a half hour unloading my “whines of the week” on him so he knew exactly what I’d been through.

So we walk in the door and he stops me in the living room and immediately begins undressing me.  As I said, I was eager, but really tired, and tried to stop him so I could get a shower first to freshen up and to maybe get a little energy back.  But he said I could get a shower in the morning, and quickly finished “skinning me.”  And then he stepped over to the couch and picked up my old flannel robe, wrapped it around me, and carried me to the bedroom — and then carefully slid me into the middle of the bed between the already turned down bed covers, tucked then in around me, and then lay down atop the covers and just held me gently until I fell asleep, (which took about thirty seconds!)

We could have made love — that is had sex — and even with my eagerness it would have been pretty crummy because I was so exhausted mentally and physically.  Instead — Roger really made some “love” in me by being so considerate and perceptive.  A week later, I’d have forgotten about the sex we could have had that night — but I’ll never forget the loving tenderness I got instead.

So — I ask you — did Roger “make love” to me that night?  I think he did — and he thinks he did, too!



PS — And not only will I not forget that night, I’ll also remember just as intensely the fun this sweet guy and I had in the shower the next morning!!

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Last Updated: May 2006

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