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|“Oceanic Disturbance! : 1” • June 13, 2005|
Good Morning Boys and Girls, Ladies and Gentlemen, and All You Sci/Fans from Whatever Screwball Dimension You Call Home!!!!
It’s time for —
We’ve got a really thrill packed show for you, and in a surprising turn of events, this episode will be hosted by our beloved world explorer and self-styled bon vivant of Woodland Wildlife Show fame, none other than Professor Brandlehurst Thistlebot!!
Welcome back, Professor!!
Thank you, my dear. This week’s show will be about the fascinating kelp forests that grow offshore along the California coast and —
Excuse me, Brandlehurst — I don’t mean to interrupt, but I never did find out exactly why you decided to leave the male only island monastery you retired to after the trampling incident. Would you like to explain that to all your fans?
Uh — well — there is really nothing to explain. I simply decided that the monastery life was not how I wished to spend the remainder of my days.
Actually, Brandlehurst — I’ve heard a few rumors — one of them is that you didn’t leave on your own accord — rumor has it that they booted you out.
It’s just a silly rumor — you know how those things get started. I’ll be glad to show you the letter of resignation that I sent them.
Well — but — there’s some other rumors circulating around — about the — “teddy bear.”
That’s total rubbish!! Just a hideous tale cooked up by my enemies in a failed attempt to discredit me!
Hmmm — if you say so — but I was more than a little shocked — and appalled when I heard it.
Absolute nonsense!! And besides, what a man and his teddy bear do in private is no concern of anyone!!
I think we need to have a LONG talk after the show, Brandlehurst.
Very well, as you wish. Just remember to keep your distance. You look far too much like those despicable Woodland Wildlife creatures that trampled me and ruined my life. I’m still making payments on the infernal Dweebmobile. And the hospital has their attorneys threatening to hospitalize me again. And remember my contract — no animal segments — and certainly no blond females!! I shall only be doing shows on vegetation — like this kelp forest and I want you to —
Now what does that blasted cameraman want? Speak up, son — don’t point — what are you trying to —
Ah, I see! There seems to be some sort of disturbance out in the water. Oh my, let’s hope it is not a seismic event — we’re in a bad location for a tsunami. Hmmm — it seems to be moving closer to shore — zoom your camera on it, lad, and let’s see if we can get a look at what’s causing —
OH MY GOD!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well — nothing like kicking the show off with a bang!! (And a hint of a scandal!! Hey — it’s network sweeps week!)
So stay tuned for the next thrilling segment of —
It’s time to really rev up your CQ, (Coolness Quotient,) and send it zooming right off the top of the scale!! Get an incredible Signature Meredith™ of “Oceanic Disturbance! : 1” today and watch your Coolth soar! It’s available in standard sizes from an intimate 10 inches by 8 inches, (about 21 inches by 19 inches with frame and matte,) up to a wall filling 30 inches by 24 inches, )about 41 inches by 35 inches with frame and matte.) We also do additional custom sizes. Each is hand signed and numbered and handcrafted in the finest museum presentation tradition. It’s also available as a budget friendly genuine Meredith Poster. And for selected poses, you can own a fabulous Life Size Meredith Cutout for wall or floor display! Check out all the details on the Buy Me page! It doesn’t matter what your CQ is already — everyone always needs a little boost of Coolth!! So grab a Fabulous Signature Meredith™ today!! Better still, grab a handful — or a double handful — or just load up a semi!! And don’t forget all the other coolth exuding treasures in MeredithMart™!
This is the Current Picture being displayed above. It’s in Color, in Landscape Format!
This one is in Gray Scale, in Landscape Format!
|Merezilla Gallery Navigation|
You gotta admit, she’s kind of a very king size blond! It’s in Color, in Landscape Format, and with Merezilla's Natural Bottom! It’s tilted “Arrival! : 1”
It has links to the “Oceanic Disturbance!”, “Arrival!”, “Quest!”, and “Satisfaction!” families of pictures.
Just when you thought that California couldn’t possibly get any stranger — Merezilla appeared out of the ocean one day off the northern coastline. (Only three syllables, “Mare Zil Luh.”) Despite what fuddy duddy Professor Brandelhurst Thistlebot thinks, (he’s on loan as narrator from the Woodland Wildlife show,) Merezilla certainly isn’t a monster. I mean, how could she possibly be a monster — she looks like me!!! She’s a really sweet girl — and blond — and 2000 foot tall — with a really bad case of the munchies — that’s gets her into just a tiny little insignificant bit of trouble! (Give the girl a break — they’re always having to rebuild San Francisco anyway! And we did manage to distract her so Los Angeles didn’t get eaten!) While the construction companies (and confectioners) work around the clock, we’ll be checking back in on Merezilla shortly. There’s a rumor, that she’s about to take a “walkabout” (as our Aussie friends would say) through the rest of the country. Watch for her to be terrorizing a city near you in the not too distance future. (You might want to consider moving to a really small town way, way out in the hinterlands!)
This is the ongoing wildlife nature show following the naked blond herds of Woodland Meredith’s (gazoongabus thunderiffic) and Scottish Jocelyn’s (hooteratii heroicus) as they live out their carefree lives in our local urban forest. The Woodland Meredith’s and Scottish Jocelyn’s are wild animals — you know, like deer, or squirrels, or something — that by an incredible coincidence, just happen to look like me and my sister Jocelyn! That can lead a to a few problems of mistaken identify at times! The show is hosted by world renowned nature researcher Brandlehurst Thistlebot (with a little help from yours truly!) Brandlehurst has had his share of mishaps with the herd and now finds himself matching wits with them on a daily basis (and not doing too well in the wit matching department!) In fact, he even quit at one point — but returned with a certain dark cloud of rumors hanging about his head! So — On With The Show!!! PS — it might be a good idea to lock up your cash, valuables, and particularly high limit credit cards before you get too close to these woodland fauna!!
This is a brand new feature just getting kicked off here in MeredithLand™! You’re gonna really like it a lot! A little science fiction, a little classical mythology, a little B-movie horror, and all of it scrambled up in typical Meredith fashion. Oh yeah — there’s also going to be a lot of very unclothed blond damsels in distress just waiting for a rescuing hero to appear! (It doesn’t get much better — right, Guys?) So stay tuned! By the way — I wanted to call it “Space Blondes” but THE Boss insisted that I add the “d” on the end! (Nobody knows all the grief I have to put up with!!! GUYS!)
This will get you to ALL the fabulous Meredith galleries! Check out the sexy ones, the funny ones, the sexy ones, the serious ones, the sexy ones, the dressy ones, the sexy ones, the nude ones, the sexy ones, the everyday ones, the sexy ones, the adventure ones, the sexy ones, etc. (You get the idea!)
This takes you to the Table of Contents of MeredithLand™ — otherwise known as the ‘Center of the Universe.’ You’ll want to spend a lot of time there exploring all the cool places in MeredithLand™ and in particular, you’ll want to check out all the incredible goodies in MeredithMart™! Just think how impressed everyone will be with your good taste!
So — are you gonna download some extraordinary Meredith wallpaper or not? We’ve got them in FIFTEEN different sizes to fit almost every kind of monitor and screen resolution. So — click the link and dress up your computer with “Oceanic Disturbance! : 1” right now! (And if you don’t, Meredemon might just stop by for a little visit!)
|This picture was first posted to my web site on March 17, 2006.|
Last Updated: October 2006
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